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-Please pray for healing for Ray

by Request ~ March 16th, 2011

Please pray for my husband.  He has cirrhosis of liver and hepatic encephalopathy

Years ago he was an alcoholic and did recreational drugs.  His days were "stoned" to numb himself from hurt of father’s young death and brother being murdered at age 24.  From the time my husband was 23 until 35 he stayed in a drunken stupor.  He worked and blew all of his money on drinking and getting high.  He held down good jobs but refrained from love or settling down feeling that he should have been the one to die and not the firstborn, athletic, prince of the family that his older brother was.

His hatred for his brothers murderer was eating away inside and the painful memories of being beaten everyday of his life by an alcoholic father didn’t help as well.  He detached from his family, did not hold long relationships, shut everyone out and numbed himself.

I married Ray in 2007 – he had been clean and sober for several years and now an outreach director in his church.  I was a children’s ministry director in my own church, and as our dating progressed he inevitably agreed to join our church.  It was only about 6 months later in beginning of 2007 that we were married.  I checked his credit, and his criminal record; unfortunately I did not check his health record.  Ray’s younger brother had been incarcerated for 9 years and was released when our marriage was 4 months old.  His brother came to live with us still addicted to heroin and alcoholism.  That spirit of addiction slowly began to creep upon him and although he did not become addicted again, when he was angry with me, I know he dabbled into that temptation casually.  6 months in to the marriage, my husband was internal bleeding and had to have blood transfusions.  It was then that I learned that he had liver disease, his liver was shot, and that he also had hepatitis C from his past years of drug use.  To avoid his risk of temptation I had to ask his brother to move. And he did.

The doctors warned him now that his mortality would depend his lifestyle, eating habits, sobriety and that any "backsliding" or non discipline could result in death.  Now 3.5 years later, he is awaiting a liver transplant.  For the most part he has minded the rules, except for a 2 month separation period in Fall of 2008.  He has maintained sobriety.  The only times he has struggled with the carnal man, it seems is when he gets around that "like-spirit" that his brother possesses.

I recently had to go to Washington DC to advocate for our higher education programs at the university that I work for.  The months before had been filled with closeness, great communication, victory over depression, zeal for the ministry and communion with my husband.  Now so victorious and closer than ever I had no fear about leaving him for the 2nd time in two years, while I traveled for the 5 day trip.  Family helped keep an eye on him, his menu and meds, and volunteered to spend time with him while I was gone.  One of those family members happened to be the addicted brother and his wife, now reconciled.  He is just now getting over his addiction but struggling, just trying to live free from drugs for possibly 1 month but still drinking alcohol. 

Although he did not do anything wrong in his presence, the "Like-Spirit" was still in our home and my Holy Spirit gone in Washington.  The next day my husband left alone, stepped out of character and I may never know if he did do anything wrong, but he was missing for several hours, totally out of character missed his medical transport ride and doctor’s appointment for testing for the transplant.  That was not like him at all.  He was seen across town at the dollar store, on the bus, etc.  and so he felt he had to tell me that he had decided to take a ride on the bus that morning, however his words were stumbling over each other.  He also seemed to trap himself in a little white lie.  But it was a lie. This troubled me and of course I had to ask him why he did that, and of course he got defensive.  Then the past mistrust issues came up.  I had to stay focused on the reason I was in Washington and could not let this distract me. 

We briefly discussed the issue when I got home – but it was clear that our relationship had changed and that even more so he had changed.  His Spirit and mine were not in sync for the past week since I got home.  There was no love or romance anymore – because I had told him that if he didn’t go after drugs or do anything to harm his body, then did he date someone else?  Why did he have to lie to me about why and what he did.  So anyway, he has been on the defensive all week.

The doctors have told me that the hepatic encephalopathy would cause him to become disoriented, confused, mood swings, sleep more, and because ammonia levels are being released into his brain because of liver dysfunction that he would not have the ability to make wise choices quickly.  So spontaneity for him could result in bad decisions in most cases. Obviously this was one of those bad decisions.  So he is angry with himself for making the bad decision and I am getting the grunt of it.

Please pray that Ray will overcome this sickness, the mood swings and most of all that as we are both ministers of the Gospel that He will alert to the wiles and tricks of the enemy.  That he will overcome by the blood of the Lamb and remain sanctified no matter whose spirit is around

He is a good man, who has been hurt much in his life.  He is a good husband that shares this life in Christ with me and that we are a great testimony to the grace of God and the life-changing power of God.  Agree with me saints, for God to triumph in his servant, his son Ray
I believe.  Yes I believe.  

Kimberly

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