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by Request ~ May 17th, 2007

Update Below:

Please pray for my family!!! Below are two journal entries that I wrote on the same day… May 12th 2007. The first one, I wrote early in the morning, when things were at their worst! But the second one was written later that night, after being visited by two people in our home.
Would you please read both journal entries and then pray for me, my wife Lori, and our 11 year old daughter, Jennifer. We would be so grateful to you for your prayers!


Lori, my wife of 28 years has been battling leukemia since August 4th, 2006.

On May 7th, 2007, the doctors told us that she doesn’t have much time to live.
So you can imagine the grieving process we are currently going through.
Lori and I are spending our remaining final days together, talking, reflecting, crying, etc…
I am grieving so badly right now! I do not know how I am going to get through this gut-wrenching time we are currently going through!

So if you try to send me an email, or a comment, and I do not reply… you will know why.

My entire life is about to be drastically altered in just a matter of weeks. After 28 years of being married to Lori… I am going to find myself suddenly single. And I am not one that can live my life without a companion by my side.
Please pray for peace and strength for my family… Lori, my wife, Jennifer, our 11 year old daughter, and me.
Sincerely, Vinnie

______________

Wow! I just want you all to know that we had two visitors come over to our home tonight. A man and a woman, who heal in the name of Jesus, and travel together on mission trips to Kenya.

The man has a unique gift from God of being able to see the spirit world around him. And the woman was diagnosed with terminal cancer 10 years ago and is still alive today. She knows who she is in Christ and understands the power of God to heal, and refused her death sentence by the doctors.

They stayed with us in our home for many hours this evening and some absolutely remarkable things happened within our household!
I am not exactly sure where this thing is going, but I can tell you that God was at work in our home and in our lives and He did some amazing things tonight!

But now that the man and woman have left our house, I can already see that fear and doubt are beginning to grip my wife and I. We need the faith that we had earlier today to come back again and rest on us!!!

Would you please pray for us to have faith and not doubt? Please pray for a complete healing and total restoration for my wife Lori from this leukemia. After the things we saw tonight with our own eyes, I know that we have come too far to just let the enemy win!!! Please pray that God will give us the victory and allow us be a living testimony to the blood, and the healing power of Jesus Christ!!!

To God be all the glory!!! Vinnie

Our Heavenly Father, Send your Holy Spirit to this family and be with them in this time of great need. Lift them up and give them comfort and great faith in your love for them in spite of the current circumstances. We pray for healing and mercy, in Jesus name, Amen.

____________________

Update:

Thursday May 17th 2007
Oh God, I cannot believe what depth we have fallen to!!! Up one day, and then down the next!!!

Five days ago, on Saturday May 12th, 2007… my wife Lori caught a spark that gave her the will to stand up and fight… and to beat her leukemia and live! For the next four days, she struggled with fear, doubt and discouragement.

Today, we had a doctors appointment. Just a routine visit; nothing major happened. But as soon as we got home, a different look appeared on Lori’s face, and her entire attitude reverted back to the way it use to be… and here are the words she spoke:

Thursday May 17th, 2007 – 12:20pm – words from Lori:
It doesn’t matter what Terry or Jan or anyone prays… it is all going to come to the same answer anyhow… I just know that God is getting ready to call me home!!! So what’s the use? Why bother?
I’m afraid that you are going to be mad at me and think that I am just giving up… but I don’t have any ‘fight’ left in me! I am just so tired!

And because Terry and Jan have said that my healing is up to me… and that this whole thing will go the way that my mind says it will… you have a right to know where my thoughts are.
I have SO many thoughts just racing around my head! I have a lot of uncertainties concerning what to do about daily life things that are hanging out there… like how to handle things with Jennifer and not leave her in the dark about my true prognosis!
I am so scared, baby! I am so confused!

I am not scared to die, because you can only trudge up that hill (the uphill battle of fighting leukemia) so far before you say “I am too tired to take another step!”

I know that I will be in heaven and that all of my pain and agony will be gone. But I am so scared, because I want to know that you and Jennifer will be okay!

I think that I would be able to go more peacefully if we were to take the time to learn about God at our own pace (even among all of the crazy appointments we have everyday) and not be in so much turmoil, if I could just accept it.

Everyone has their appointed time to leave this earth, and I just think that I would feel more peaceful if we went with the understanding that God is going to do what He wants to do!

It is a terrible burden to put on someone; the responsibility of their own healing! There is so much heaviness that comes with this, and if I didn’t have this tremendous burden weighing me down, I don’t think that my last days would be as stressful. This is why I cannot find joy in anything right now!!!

Comments:

Vinnie, I am so sorry that your wife and family are going through such a turmoil. A terminal sickness is a tragedy and difficult enough to deal with without feeling the burden for ones own healing. Lori cannot heal herself through having the right thoughts or enough faith. This is not a Biblical teaching. Only God heals. When Jesus resurrected Lazarus, Lazarus was dead and had no faith and neither did his family, yet he was raised from the dead.

Terry and Jan may have an anointing for healing, but it is God who does the healing and when those with an authentic healing ministry pray for people, sometimes people are healed, there are even occasions when many are healed, and sometimes they aren’t.

I’m sure that Terry and Jan must have tremendous faith or they would not have an anointing for healing. When someone they pray for is not healed they probably try to figure out why. Sometimes it is faith, sometimes other reasons. Many times there is no why except God heals or he doesn’t.

Sometimes God heals with just one prayer, sometimes with many, sometimes today, sometimes tomorrow. Bottom line, all Christians are eventually healed, there is no sickness or death in our eternal future.

It is important to be open to what God is doing and pray for the Holy Spirit to be with you in the process. Only God through his Holy Spirit can bring you peace and joy in the midst of what your family is going through. I am praying for your family:

Come Holy Spirit and be with this family and bless each one, lift them up and give them your joy and peace, and give them encouragement and confidence in your love for them. In Jesus name, Amen.

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